A Happy Story

We met in an alley, and she was nice, and I was nice, and things went about as well as one could expect from a meeting in a random alley behind a shop which sold beads. We exchanged numbers. Had a conversation about geckos. That kind of thing.

When I called her several days later, nervous and slightly incoherent, she invited me to a picnic at what she called her church, which turned out to be a cult worshipping an ancient god of plumbing. The whole building was done up with Schedule 40 pipe, with charming figurines made of copper tube soldered together. Very tasteful. All the priests had long-handled plungers.

We wound up getting married there. The service was nice. I didn't convert, but she didn't care, as long as I agreed that the kids would be taught her faith as well as mine. Since I had been raised by wolves, there was a lot of howling. The neighbor's dogs were confused for a while, but they got over it.

We're very happy. Sorry you can't be here.

Love,
Andrea

No comments: